Dirty Thirty: 30 Hot Takes about Culture & Fashion to Celebrate my Thirtieth Birthday
I cannot f*cking believe I'm 30 this week.
Today is my 30th birthday. I may have had a miniature crisis in the days and weeks leading up to it, but I’m no different from anyone else turning 30. I’ve been doing a lot of self-reflection, thinking of things that went wrong and others that went right. I’m commemorating my 30th with a couple small watch purchases, but more on that later. I thought the best way to celebrate 30 years on this platform was to get 30 hot and brazy takes on record.
I’m usually one to write positively about fashion and culture. I believe there is too much negativity out there on the internet from some of our favorite podcasters and culture writers. People need to be more positive about fashion and culture - everything is subjective anyway. That being said, I want to get a little spicy. This piece will be somewhat of a mix between crazy takes, and life lessons. Let’s do it.
My Dirty 30 Hot Takes
Most people are into clothing because they want to be seen, not for the love of the game. The majority of people purchase designer clothing to be seen in them, not for the love of the game. We live in a very superficial society. Find peace in that.
Modern Audemars Piguet and modern Rolex are the apex of tacky. Guys trying to show off money. How gauche! Vintage Rolex, Cartier (not the Santos), Tudor, certain Omegas, IWC, Casio, and Seiko are much more chic and understated.
The internet moves fast and any “cool,” niche thing you like will be mainstream within a few weeks. If that bothers you, you’ll need to learn to let go. I was wearing ALD in 2017, way before it was mainstream. I don’t care that everyone wears it now.
The most stylish people are not those who buy head-to-toe designer. The most stylish people are those who critically think about their outfits and know how to get crafty with them. A blend of basics, vintage, statement, and accessories.
It’s a pretty low bar to be stylish. Don’t listen to all these fashion “experts” on podcasts who have a narrow view of what’s cool. Just pay attention to how the clothing looks and feels on you. Confidence is a huge key to it. Straight-fit jeans. A pair of boots and a slightly oversized t-shirt with a fun jacket over it is all you'll ever need.
People want to be three things on Twitter: smart, funny, and right. There is a chance that they are none of those. Twitter is not a real place, and people on there want to have a take go viral. It’s an unserious place.
New Balance sneakers are more comfortable than Nike, Converse, Adidas, and Vans. It took for certain brands to collaborate with them to bring them back, but they really are great.
Boat shoes are NOT back. Boat shoes are for fratty college kids. I’ve been there once, and I’m not going back. Eventually, everyone needs to grow up.
Skinny jeans are also never coming back. We need to learn to prioritize comfort en route to looking great. skinny jeans are for skinny people, and even then they probably don’t look good.
I hate being this guy, but there is art that is easy and mass-produced and there is art that requires a bit more intelligence to understand. The best example is the current discourse around Drake and Kendrick Lamar. Criminal activity aside-Drake is a pop star cosplaying as a tough guy. He makes catchy music for the masses that’s very easy to understand. You can turn off your brain, have a fun time, and party to it. While Kendrick Lamar also has a big following with his catalog of mainstream songs, you may need to work a little harder to understand everything he produces. He is a complex lyricist with layers like that of an onion. A governing body awarded him a Pulitzer Prize - an award that traditionally only goes to jazz & classical music - because it is so advanced. The problem is that people who love Drake love to criticize Kendrick and his fans, saying that “no one wants to hear his quintuple entendre,” and that it “won’t go up in the club.” We are in the midst of an anti-intellectual movement in this country and it’s pretty apparent when Drake fans call Kendrick Lamar fans pretentious. Let’s not put Drake and Kendrick in the same sentence. It’s the same thing as people putting Avengers: Endgame in the same sentence as Jeanne Dielman or 2001: A Space Odyssey. There’s no shame in admitting that something is advanced. Apples and Oranges. Some things are on a different level. It’s okay.
For my basketball fans: 6-0 in the finals vs 4-6 is no longer a valid argument for who the GOAT is. It lacks perspective, context, and nuance. It’s a low-IQ argument for low-IQ people. Lebron has been the greatest basketball player of all time since 2016; he cemented it in 2018 and put the cherry on top in 2020. Enjoy greatness. There are two players in the GOAT debate: MJ & LBJ. That’s it. No Kareem, no Kobe and certainly no fucking Steph. On that note: if Warriors fans weren’t so insecure and desperate to put Steph’s name up there, he wouldn't be as hated. He is a top 12-15 player ever, and you should be happy with that. You guys ruined him for everyone else.
Good watches are meant to last a lifetime. Hypothetically we only need one timepiece for all occasions. I don’t blame people for collecting. I do it myself, but at a certain point, we’re wasting our money by purchasing so many of them.
If you work in a corporate office, you should put your best foot forward with your wardrobe. I haven’t loved working in corporate America. Frankly, I don’t know how anyone could, but if we’re going to be in corporate America, we may as well play the game, which includes how we dress. At a previous job, I felt like I was passed over for promotion. The people who were rewarded promotions dressed in bland clothes, but their shoes were usually desert boots or something adjacent and they usually wore a collar. Meanwhile, I was wearing Supreme, hoodies, and shorts to the office. I think that my style, despite making me a popular kid in my office, cost me some money. We should aim to look good within the context of where we are.
If you're looking for the best "go anywhere, do anything" watch, you won’t do better than an Apple Watch. Sure, they look dorky and you have to charge them every night. You also probably shouldn’t be wearing one at a wedding, but aside from that, it’s the perfect watch for almost any other occasion. If you aren't much of a watch guy and want a good watch, then an Apple watch is fine.
Sneakers are not, and never will be dead. Attempts to kill them are ill-advised. I understand the idea of wanting to look grown up, but you can still achieve that with a simple pair of sneakers. Also, as we age, we begin to value comfort. Nothing is more comfortable than a pair of New Balances.
Drinking like a fish isn't cool. I drank a lot in my early and mid-20s and now the idea of having more than 2 drinks a night on a Saturday sounds like a living hell. Hangovers went from a couple of tough hours in the morning to multi-day marathons. Turning 30 means you're 10 years away from 40. We need to take better care of ourselves.
Let people like what they like. I hate it when influencers and media personalities are so negative about everything. Who cares if people like bad stuff? Who cares if kids want to take fit pics in the street? Don't let the talk get to you.
I think the world would be a better place if people were required to read books and watch classic movies versus spending so much time doom-scrolling. I'm guilty of the doomscroll from time to time, but watching films like Beau Travail and Late Spring and reading novels like Under the Volcano has broadened my worldview. Much better time spent than scrolling on "hustle-tok."
People should embrace some "older" technology every once in a while. Use an old film or digital camera in addition to your iPhone. Buy a radio to play music while you do chores or work from home. I LOVE my radio. There are certain Bay Area radio shows I tune into every week. Technology is so good these days that it makes us retreat into it too much. Think about the fact that when you're listening to the radio, several thousand people are listening to the same thing as you. That builds stronger feelings of connection with others.
I don't think this is much of a hot take, but vintage clothing will always be better quality than modern clothing. Capitalism is ruining everything. More units are produced at a fraction of the quality. Just feel 90s t-shirt vs one made today. There’s no comparison.
We should always be trying to do a "hard thing." When we stop doing hard things when we stop growing. I have a very intimate view of what arrested development looks like and it scares the shit out of me.
I feel much wiser than I did when I was 20, but I still feel like I don't know shit. I guess that feeling never goes away.
Certain items are worth the investment: a good pair of jeans (vintage if possible), a good watch to be passed down to your children, sturdy boots, a suit that will last a lifetime. A lot of clothing doesn’t need a substantial investment (avoid fast fashion), but some things do.
The Great Gatsby could never be the great American novel. I know it's about the downside of the American Dream, but I always found it too hopeful. The best books I've ever read about America are McCarthy’s Blood Meridian and Morrison’s Beloved - the novels that tell the stories of America's greatest sins. That's what this country is at its core.
Some people will do the bare minimum. Others will go above and beyond at work. Neither way is necessarily wrong or right.
Not only is social media keeping us depressed, but it’s keeping us broke. A lot of your friends are probably going into debt to stay in their “bucket-list hotels". We need to detach from this made-up world.
Everything, Everywhere, All At Once is a TERRIBLE movie and the worst Best Picture winner I’ve ever seen. The Academy is no longer an independently thinking voting body. They’re easily persuaded by preceding award shows and general narratives. Oppenheimer is a great movie, but it felt like it was predetermined that it would win Best Picture months before the Oscars. Drive My Car, Tár & Killers of the Flower Moon are the rightful Best Picture winners from the last three years.
If you have the fortune, the best thing you can do for yourself in the long term is buy property. I purchased my first home in 2020 and have one of the best interest rates in modern history. I understand it’s much more difficult now, but it’s the best investment you can make if you can swing it. On the flip side, I do understand that so many people aren’t in a position to do it.
It is true that when you hit 30 you care less what people think of you. You should be doing what you think is best for yourself, not everyone else.
We all need simplification. Less time online. Less stress about our dumb jobs. I have all the ambition in the world, but I also strive to simplify my life one day at a time.
Peace and Love